There is's a reason it's called the BOOB tube

Well hello my little bloglings, I am so so so sorry I haven't posted anything in a while, I have been very busy and kind of couldn't find inspiration. BUT FEAR NOT!!! I am back with a TV post and coming next week we may or may not have a guest blogger.  I will prolly do this from time to time, so if anyone is interested, let me know, or forever hold your peace. Now, with no further adieu, your blog post.

Television, is a device created by man for, well everyone, but mostly men.  Yet somehow we let our airwaves be drowned out by crap.  Look T.V. brings the family together, sad but true, and thats awesome, i am all about family time, but some of these things on TV just make you say "are you fuckin serious???" and then someone says "yea i'm fuckin serious, your point?" then you say "shut up, dick."  But sometimes you come across some programs of TOTAL badassness!!!

We all have our favorite things to watch, sports, fighting, cartoons, the news, shark week, whatever you enjoy, TV has it, and yes boobies too.  what do you enjoy?? Politics? fuck you go to there is a whole block of programming for you, it's called CSPAN. Sports, take your pick from one of the many ESPN channels, whatever you crave, the box gots it. All i am here to do is tell you what i like to watch and what you shouldn't be watching, to be a solid dude.

Adam's top 3 Likes on TV

1.  Cartoon Network- i mean what makes you feel more like a kid than cartoons? and this channel has it in it's name, yea the programming has gone downhill a little bit over the past years, but thats just because FOX reinstated Family Guy.  and they don't really have any anime on until like 4am, who is up then??? i want my Big O at 11pm right when i have to go to bed.

2. Fuel TV- it's an extreme sports channel, and it plays some good tunes on some of these shows too.  There is even a show dedicated to guys slamming....haaaaard! and the only channel that has Surfing played on it.

3. History/Discovery Channel- I am all about learning, and Mythbusters, and American Pickers, and Sharks, and Modern Marvels, and Sharks.  who had the idea to say "hey boss lets have a whole week of shows dedicated to sharks fucking shit up"  b/c that man is a genius

Things you shouldn't watch unless you need to feel better about yourself:


Jersey Shore, who gives a damn about what these over privileged pukes.  Apparently most of America, when did we become retarded??? i say  it was Vietnam.  but the girls on this show aren't hot, the guys are idiots, and yet they make a ton of money

American Idol-  if i wanted to watch Karaoke i would head on down to Sports Page and have a beer and watch the old people sing.  Simon Cowell is gone, i now give this show 2 more years before it's cancelled

Sister Wives- do i really need to say anything else about this???

Teen Mom/16 and Pregnant- i admit, i watch this sometimes, mostly to try and figure out WHAT THE FUCK ARE PARENTS DOING!!!??? like for serious, these shows piss me off so bad b/c i can't figure out how teenagers can have sex and just assume everything is going to be all peaches.

next post will prolly be about beer

Dudequette Lesson One: The Shaker (Public Restrooms)

Alright so in a public restroom there are certain rules, i shouldn't have to remind you but there may be some things you don't know, or you do and you don't care because you suck at life.  So here is your refresher course El Sucktron.

1. When entering a public restroom and someone at a urinal looks over all that is required is "The Man Nod" (you know what that is, so i won't tell you), anything more than that makes you look gay and you want to touch his naughty bits.  So no high fives, or hand shakes, or "hey whats up hows the family?"

2a. When stepping up to the urinal always leave at least one urinal between you and anyone else.  If you must be the meat to two guys white bread, you look like a weaker man because your timing to go pee was off, and thus you again are a girl.

2b.  This one is kind of a given, never, ever, under any circumstance, look at another man at a different urinal, even if it is one of your bros, no, unacceptable.

2c.  Don't talk at the urinal.  If spoken to, the only acceptable answers are one or two word responses, like "Fuck Off" or "Shut Up" or maybe if you swing that way "My Place?"

3.  Don't hover! sit your ass down, take your shit, wipe, and get off.  You aren't a girl, there is no need to hover.

3a. When you sit down to drop the Cosby kids off at the pool, whether you know it or not, you are in a game of Battle Shits with anyone else in the bathroom, so make those Cosby kids do a couple cannon balls!

4. Wash your filthy hands, thats what separates us from the monkeys! Rinsing them off with water does in fact count.

5. Don't write on the walls, the only people who do that are kids and trailer trash, which kids pretty much are, so just trailer trash then